


Harbor

by Enchantable



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Major Character Injury
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-17
Updated: 2020-06-17
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:27:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24779131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Enchantable/pseuds/Enchantable
Summary: “Come on, Guerin, stay with me,” he mutters.That’s the bitch about CPR. It’s life preserving. But that’s it, it preserves. No matter how many of Michael’s ribs he breaks, no matter how long he spends putting his body weight into pumping his heart, unless someone with an AED or Max shows up soon, Alex knows he’s going to lose him.The priority is chest compressions but Alex can’t take any risks with Michael’s mind. Not after he just started college classes.
Relationships: Michael Guerin/Alex Manes
Comments: 7
Kudos: 141
Collections: Something Cosmic





	Harbor

**Author's Note:**

> Original prompt: casualcloudlighttrash Not sure if you are taking prompt buts if you are Post S2 prompt: I just want to see Alex quietly singing/humming The Song to Michael. Maybe Michael's hurt and in pain or they've both had a really emotional event happen and are totally drained from crying. I want that song to be a source of comfort. My partner isn't an amazing singer but I still find it really comforting when he sings to me and I like to think Michael and Alex eventually get to that point too.

It doesn’t work like the movies.

A lot of things aren’t like the movies, and Alex says that as someone who spends his days surrounded by aliens and working for a top secret government outfit. He’s wished things were like the movies before. Computers were as easy, the military was as interesting state side, that love and families worked the same way.

That CPR worked that way.

“Come on, Guerin, stay with me,” he mutters.

That’s the bitch about CPR. It’s life preserving. But that’s it, it preserves. No matter how many of Michael’s ribs he breaks, no matter how long he spends putting his body weight into pumping his heart, unless someone with an AED or Max shows up soon, Alex knows he’s going to lose him.

The priority is chest compressions but Alex can’t take any risks with Michael’s mind. Not after he just started college classes. There’s nothing romantic about breathing for Michael and Michael isn’t going to respond but Alex desperately hopes as he pushes air into Michael’s lungs before returning to pumping his chest. This is the most physical contact they’ve had in months and he tells himself he’s imagining Michael’s body temperature is cooler.

“Michael!”

Max’s scream makes all the hairs on the back of Alex’s arms stand up. He looks over at the doppelgänger and prays that this is the right Max. Michael was sure. Alex has no choice but to trust him. He breathed for Michael again as Max drops to his knees before he shoves himself backwards. Only a law of physics could get him to pull back as Max claps his hands against Michael’s chest. Electricity jumps and Michael’s body goes tense. He doesn’t jump but as Alex stares his chest moves on it’s own.

“Hang on,” Max says, “you’re okay,” and he focuses on healing him.

Michael coughs with healed lungs and ribs and then inhales deeply, his eyes opening. Horror fills his features as his brain catches up and he shoves himself upright, looking between Max and the doppelgänger, the doppelgänger and Alex. Alex doesn’t know what happened but the blank horror in Michael’s eyes makes his worry increase instead of retreating. Michael grabs for Max and winds up half in his lap, his hands fisted in Max’s shirt as Max holds him tightly.

“You’re okay,” Max repeats. Michael blindly shakes his head, “yes, you’re okay,” he says.

“I killed him,” Michael chokes out, “he said he knew i had it in me!”

Alex forces himself to look at the body. It’s identical to Max, right down to what he’s wearing. His chest is caved in and his neck is bent. Alex hopes that Michael crushed his chest and he suffered. He listens to Michael sob and hopes the doppelgänger was scared. Before he stopped Michael’s heart. Alex doesn’t want to touch him but more than that he doesn’t want Michael to wind up at the police station.

“Get him out of here,” he says to Max, “I’ll take care of this.”

“What? No—“

“Yes,” Isobel appears suddenly, taking in all the info before turning to Alex, “we’ll take care of this,” she looks at Michael, “you take care of him.”

He and Isobel work quickly to dispose of the body. Thankfully between the two of them and her alien powers, it goes fast. Alex isn’t sure if this is a thank you situation. When he opens his mouth, Isobel closes her eyes and then furrows her brow. Alex knows enough about freaky twin powers to know what’s going on. The worry doesn’t ease. She looks over at him.

“We need to go,” she says.

“We?” He asks, his heart jumping, “what’s wrong with Michael?”

“He’s unresponsive.”

Alex barely remembers the drive to Max’s house. When he gets there with Isobel, Max barely acknowledges them and brings them back to his room. Michael is sitting on the bed staring blankly ahead. His curls are limp and dripping onto the towel around his shoulders. Another is around his hips. Max’s handprints dot his chest but there’s one in the middle of it that is darker and angrier. It looks like a burn. The skin around it is raw like Michael’s tried to scrub it off.

“I got him clean but he just stopped,” Max says, dragging his eyes from Michael to Isobel, “can you—“

“I think we should let Alex try,” isobel says. Max looks surprised and even in her worry, Isobel manages to look exasperated. She softens when she looks at Alex, “come on, let’s get some acetone in you,” she says, steering Max down the hall, “Michael will be fine, he’s with Alex.”

Alex wishes he had as much trust in those words as she seems to.

He steps inside and closes the door behind him, walking over to Michael. The only acknowledge Michael makes of his presence is to close his eyes and try to make himself smaller. Alex crouches down in front of him. He can feel the pain radiating off Michael but he doesn’t know if it’s one particular thing or everything that has just happened.

“Can I touch you?” He asks. Michael lets out a shaky breath but nods, “we don’t have to talk,” Alex tells him and that gets Michael to relax, just fractionally. O

He starts with Michaels hair, using the towel to press as much water as he can out of it. He doesn’t know where Michael’s clothes are. He doesn’t want to see any of them again, though it’s Michael so he has a feeling they’ll make another appearance. It’s easy enough to find a pair of sweats and a hoodie and help Michael be steady as he gets them on.

“He looked at me like Max looks at me,” Michael blurts out suddenly, “he said he expected me to do it, like Max used to say when I wound up in prison,” he chews his bottom lip, “I feel different,” he stares at Alex, “why does it feel different?”

“You were dead,” Alex says, the words tasting like ash.

“Yeah but I’m not,” Michael bites his lip, “Max said killing changed him. Killing—“

“Hey, look at me,” Alex says, “did you love Max less? Or me less?” Michael shakes his head, “everything makes us different, that’s part of being alive.”

“I didn’t enjoy it,” Michael says, “he said I would but I didn’t.”

Alex nods. He’s killed people and the only joy has been in that they didn’t kill him or his unit first. But he doesn’t want to unpack the fine details and risk Michael going quiet again. Michael looks at the bed nervously and Alex knows that however much he needs sleep, the idea of closing his eyes must be unfathomable. Alex sits on the side of the bed and Michael stands there.

“I can’t—“

“Just sit,” Alex says, “please.”

Michael warily approaches him and then sits, leaving a good foot of space between them. Alex can follow the logic that it’s better for Michael to be around family. That hopefully the smell of Max will make any nightmares he has about killing him go away. If he could Alex knows Michael will sit there all night, stubborn until the end.

“You need to sleep,” Alex says.

“Yeah,” Michael replies. He hesitates, “can you—“

“I can stay,” Alex tells him.

There’s a shift and he isn’t sure who moves first or how he winds up with Michaels head in his lap. He exhales at the warmth of Michael’s head on his thigh. He doesn’t seem to be alone in his need for physical contact, even though he knows Michael doesn’t remember him giving cpr. Michael exhales shakily against his jeans. To his completely surprise he sees him relax more. Like maybe Michael’s also missed them touching these past few months.

He starts to sing.

Alex hasn’t sung the song he wrote in a long time. There have been other songs but this one has stayed tucked away, waiting for the right time. Michael trembles against him and Alex isn’t sure if it’s tears or shower water that dampens his jeans, but he keeps singing. Until Michael’s breathing turns even and he drifts off. It’s a miracle that he feels safe enough to do it. Alex wasn’t sure that they would ever be able to find that safe place again.

The door cracks open and Isobel tip toes in, looking purely relieved at the sight of Michael asleep. She focuses on him for a moment longer.

“I just made sure he’d stay asleep,” she says to Alex, “come on, you need some food.”

“I don’t want to leave him,” Alex admits.

“I know, you can come right back.”

Alex doesn’t know why he follows her and manages to get down food. It should feel like he’s an interloper but instead he feels like he belongs. Like Michael is always where he’s belonged. He looks over his shoulder to see blankets and pillows stacked on the couch.

“I figured you two could take the bed,” Max says.

“I—“ Alex stops and nods, “thank you.”

Max nods back at him. Michael is the one who died and the one who killed him, but Alex knows he’s never going to forget the feeling of keeping Michael alive. He’s grateful that they both seem to get it. It’s not something Alex is sure he could explain. When he gets back to the room he takes off his jacket and his shoes and gets into bed with Michael. Isobel said he wouldn’t wake up so Alex knows he’s not disturbing him by putting his arms around him.

“Alex?” Michael mumbles.

“Sorry, I—“

Michael grabs his hands before he can pull them back and keeps them close.

“S’fine,” he says.

Alex breathes until his heart rate is back down. Thankfully that doesn’t seem to wake Michael up. Neither does Alex finding a comfortable spot so he’s not smothered by the riot of Michael’s curls. It’s awkward to make the pieces fit together, edges have changed and things don’t go exactly where he remembered them as being. But he figures it out. They fit differently but they still fit. The pieces still want to be together. Alex has never met a fight he didn’t want to be a part of. And he’s sure in the morning there will be more to talk about.

But for tonight, he let pieces be together. 


End file.
